Daphne:

This is such an engaging start to this story! I was so invested by the end of the story, I’m a sucker for good characters who feel real, which you did super well. The hyper specificity of the main character’s interests and life provide a lot of insight on the type of person they are. The same goes for the mother and the man at the grocery store. I like that you kept the mother’s location a mystery, it just added to the feeling of disconnect between the main character and her. As for suggestions, I just wanted more from the two men. I was invested in their interaction and just wanted them to meet again, maybe a month or so later in the same place or something? I thought the inner monologue about the struggles of sexuality and love could be something to be explored too. The amount of characterization you fit in in just a few pages is staggering! Really well done!