Coco,

This was such a gripping read; Once I picked it up to read, I didn’t want to put it down. There was a lot I loved about your piece, but the metaphors and tone by far were really strong to me. I loved the way that the narrator spoke about Tatiana and their brief relationship. I could feel the desperation at the end of each passage. The tension felt consistent and well balanced throughout. I did find myself wondering what would’ve happened if their residents walked in to them arguing. What would they have seen? I also really liked the way you portrayed the narrator’s jealousy over the boyfriend. It was petty but also so nuanced. As far as suggestions, I would want to see more on Tatiana other than looks (unless that’s all the narrator really knows about her). Is the narrator only drawn to her physical appearance? Or is there a different quality that drew them together? I was also curious if there was an ulterior motive for Tatiana dating Dyllan; Since the characters attend a Christian college, I think you could explore more on the expectations and pressures of that culture, or maybe look into expressing how Tatiana might not actually feel anything for Dyllan but has to be with him because of social pressures or shamefulness. Great work! I really enjoyed this piece!